#EDDIE MURPHY KIDS ARE CRUEL MOVIE#

'And then, when I got to high school, my older brother was cool, so I was suddenly cool by association. I literally had a girl in my room once, showing her, like, Indian pennies. That's not gonna close many sales for you.

But it was hard to get laid by telling a girl that you have a 1916D Mercury dime in very fine condition. I was a coin collector instead of a football player. These are obviously painful memories, but Spade long ago converted them into material. Wow, it's two colors! You spoil me, you now, let's not make his life totally terrible.' I stayed in my grade but alienated everyone by being, like, brainiac.' ' It was one of those divorces, he split one day and then he'd show up once a year and give me a Nerf football for Christmas, thought he was my hero again. Similarly, Spade's jokes about his deadbeat dad, who abandoned his mother and two older brothers when Davey was 5, are bristling with indignation. I'm saying: Don't make your kids look hot and dirty and sexy when they're 5 years old! It's really not the place or the time.

'It's so weird to see her wearing that red cowboy hat with sparkles on it, singing I'm a Yankee Doodle Dandy,' ' Spade says, analyzing his quip about the bludgeoned beauty princess. He observed: 'She's not as hot without makeup.' That prompted Spade's 60-year-old mother in Scottsdale, Ariz., to call him and chide, 'That was a terrible thing to say. The day before on Stern's show, Spade had complained about seeing yet another photograph of JonBenet Ramsey in the National Enquirer. 'Some of the things you say offend so many people,' he says. He's alluding to his comic stance as a victimized white Anglo-Saxon Protestant male, ashamed of his political incorrectness but resentful of such daily affronts as an inconsiderate Hispanic hotel maid, screeching 'House-kipping!' at 6 a.m., or a fast-talking Chinese real estate agent trying to gouge him on a Beverly Hills rental property. 'If you hung out with me and my friends for five minutes, I would be eliminated from show business,' Spade goes on. 'Sometimes that makes the joke a little harder. He washes it down, incongruously, with a bottle of Evian. 'There's always really a hint of truth that makes it worth saying,' Spade continues his humor analysis, furtively forking his scrambled eggs, garnished with an artery-clogging rasher of bacon and sausage. A baseball cap is jammed over his straw-blond, shower-wet hair. His left hand is blackly inked with scrawled names and phone numbers he would otherwise forget. A skinny 5 feet 6, he suffers from hypoglycemia, a stiff neck and a bad back, among other complaints. He barely belongs amid the sleek power-breakfasters who populate the Four Seasons dining room. Stubble-chinned and sleepy-eyed, wan and waiflike, he resembles a college kid recovering from an all-nighter. to do his stand-up routine for an audience of 3,000 at George Washington University.

It's the morning after the 33-year-old Spade, taking advantage of a recent break from 'Just Shoot Me,' visited New York for guest appearances on Howard Stern's radio show and David Letterman's television show, where he was obliged to discuss the December drug-overdose death of his comic soulmate Chris Farley.

And, hopefully, underlying all my jokes is an element of surprise.' So if you can make that an art form, where people want to hear what you're going to say about something, it can be cruel and funny. 'It's just easier to make fun and cut down,' he explains quite amiably, deconstructing his trademark humor over breakfast at the Four Seasons Hotel in Georgetown. So is this self-avowed 'new buddy' zinging his interviewer about the soul-killing superficiality of the celebrity/journalist co-dependency? Or is it just possible that Spade merely wants to be.

#EDDIE MURPHY KIDS ARE CRUEL MOVIE#

Make a wish!' He has reinforced this mordant pose with his portrayals of a sarcastic assistant at a fashion magazine on the hit NBC series 'Just Shoot Me' (which this week joins the network's formidable Thursday lineup, airing at 8:30) and a rich, snotty frat boy who torments financial aid student Marlon Wayans in the movie comedy 'Senseless.' Given his biting comic persona - with its tone of unctuous geniality that suddenly turns into snide disdain - it's easier to believe that Spade is just setting up another of his caustic punch lines.Īfter all, he established himself in the popular culture of the '90s as the stiletto-tongued entertainment reporter who presented the 'Hollywood Minute' on 'Saturday Night Live' - once obliterating 'SNL' alumnus Eddie Murphy, whose film career was in decline, with: 'Look, kids, a falling star!. 'You're with your new buddy now,' David Spade claims.

Eddie murphy kids are cruel